Once In A Blue Moon


Gaslighting is a deeply manipulative tactic that can leave individuals feeling bewildered, powerless, and disconnected from their own reality. Stephanie Moulton Sarkis’ book, aptly titled “Gaslighting,” offers invaluable insights into this form of emotional abuse and provides a roadmap to break free from its toxic grip. In this article, we will explore some key takeaways from Sarkis’ book that can empower you to regain control of your life, heal from the effects of gaslighting, and rebuild your self-confidence.

Understanding Gaslighting

At its core, gaslighting is a power play. Manipulative individuals employ this tactic to gain control over others by distorting the truth, denying reality, and systematically undermining the victim’s perception of their own experiences. The ultimate goal is to make the victim doubt their sanity and rely unquestioningly on the manipulator.

Recognizing the Signs

Gaslighting can take many forms, making it challenging to identify. Recognizing the signs is the first step to breaking free from its insidious grasp. These signs may include constant lying, denial of events or conversations, trivializing your feelings, and projecting blame onto you. Being aware of these tactics can help you identify when you are being gaslit and respond accordingly.

Trusting Your Instincts

Gaslighting often aims to erode your self-trust and intuition. It is crucial to trust your instincts and not dismiss your feelings or perceptions just because someone is trying to convince you otherwise. Your intuition is a valuable compass, and gaslighters will often attempt to manipulate you into disregarding it.

Seeking Support

Gaslighting is isolating by nature. Manipulators may try to cut you off from friends, family, or other sources of support. To break free from the cycle, reach out to trusted individuals who can provide a different perspective and help validate your experiences. Building a support network is crucial for your emotional well-being.

Setting Boundaries

Establishing clear boundaries is essential when dealing with gaslighting. Communicate your needs, assert your rights, and refuse to engage in manipulative conversations or behaviors. Setting and enforcing boundaries is a powerful way to protect yourself and assert your agency.

Practicing Self-Care

Gaslighting can have a profound impact on your mental and emotional well-being. Prioritize self-care activities that help you relax, recharge, and rebuild your sense of self-worth. Engage in activities that nourish your mind, body, and soul, such as meditation, exercise, hobbies, or spending time with loved ones.

Educating Yourself

Knowledge is power. The more you educate yourself about gaslighting and manipulation tactics, the better equipped you will be to recognize and respond effectively. Stephanie Moulton Sarkis’ book is an excellent resource, but there are also numerous articles, websites, and support groups dedicated to helping survivors of gaslighting.

Seeking Professional Help if Needed

Breaking free from gaslighting can be a challenging journey. If you find yourself struggling to cope with its effects, consider seeking therapy or counseling. A mental health professional can provide guidance, support, and strategies to help you heal, regain your confidence, and rebuild your life.


Nobody deserves to endure the torment of gaslighting. By understanding the tactics involved and taking proactive steps to protect yourself, you can break free from the cycle of manipulation and regain control of your life with confidence. Stephanie Moulton Sarkis’ book, “Gaslighting,” offers a valuable guide to this journey of self-discovery and healing. Remember that you are not alone, and with the right tools and support, you can overcome the effects of gaslighting and reclaim your reality.

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