The pursuit of happiness has become a modern obsession. From motivational slogans to life advice, we’re constantly told to chase what makes us happy, to cut off anything that doesn’t, and to measure success by our emotional state. But if happiness is the only thing that matters, then we have misunderstood what it means to live a meaningful life.

Raising children is a clear example. Parenting is filled with moments that are anything but happy. Sleepless nights, tantrums, sacrifices, and worry form a large part of the experience. If a parent were guided solely by what makes them happy, many would walk away. But parenting is not about chasing happiness. It is about responsibility, commitment, growth, and love—none of which guarantee constant pleasure.

The same applies to relationships, careers, and personal development. A healthy marriage will include hard conversations. A fulfilling career may require working through boredom or frustration. Becoming a better person often means facing pain, discomfort, and failure. If happiness were the only metric, we would abandon everything the moment it became difficult.

This doesn’t mean happiness is irrelevant. It’s just incomplete. It is one emotional state among many. What gives life depth is not constant joy, but the ability to do what’s right, meaningful, and necessary even when it doesn’t feel good in the moment. Enduring difficulty for the sake of something greater is often the path to a deeper kind of satisfaction—one rooted in purpose, not just momentary pleasure.

A worldview that places happiness at the top of the value ladder often crumbles under real pressure. It can make people selfish, shallow, or quick to abandon others when the road gets rough. It can devalue sacrifice, integrity, and effort. It can leave people hollow, wondering why chasing happiness hasn’t made them whole.

True fulfillment comes from living in alignment with values, not moods. Raising kids, building something worthwhile, showing up for others, and doing hard things even when you don’t feel like it—these are the cornerstones of a meaningful life. Happiness might show up along the way, but it shouldn’t be the compass. Something more stable and demanding should guide us. Otherwise, we risk abandoning the very things that give life its weight and worth.