A habit is not good or bad in isolation. It is good or bad in what it does to your energy, attention, relationships, and future options. You can tell the difference by looking at outcomes, motives, and the systems around the behavior.
A fast definition
- Healthy habit
A repeated behavior that reliably improves health, skills, relationships, or freedom of choice, with low hidden cost. - Unhealthy habit
A repeated behavior that trades long term well being for short term relief or stimulation, with costs that tend to grow over time.
The five tests
Ask these questions. If a behavior fails three or more, call it unhealthy.
- Energy test
Do I feel better after, not just during, the behavior for at least two hours? - Trajectory test
After a month of this, will my life be slightly easier, richer in options, or more stable? - Replacement test
If I skip it once, do I feel neutral, or do I feel anxious and compelled to compensate? - Honesty test
Would I describe the full details to a mentor or child without editing? - Cost test
Are the costs small, clear, and planned for, or are they hidden, creeping, or denied?
Signs a habit is healthy
- It is easy to explain in one sentence without justification.
- It creates positive spillovers, like better sleep, clearer thinking, or improved mood.
- It is compatible with your values and does not require secrecy.
- It scales. Doing a bit more does not cause outsized harm.
- It survives schedule changes because it is simple and portable.
Signs a habit is unhealthy
- It needs euphemisms or jokes to feel acceptable.
- It erodes sleep, savings, trust, or attention, even if the effect is delayed.
- It grows in required dose to get the same effect.
- It thrives in shame or isolation.
- It crowds out better options that you keep postponing.
Domain by domain guide
Body
Healthy: walking after meals, strength work, whole foods, steady bedtime.
Unhealthy: chronic sleep restriction, binge eating, extreme programs that you cannot sustain, stimulants to mask fatigue.
Mind
Healthy: focused blocks of work, reading, mindful breaks, journaling short and honest.
Unhealthy: constant background noise to avoid thinking, doom scrolling, multitasking that shatters attention.
Money
Healthy: pay yourself first, planned treats, friction on impulse buys, tracking once a week.
Unhealthy: buy to change feelings, debt used for consumption, no plan for irregular expenses.
Relationships
Healthy: direct asks, clean boundaries, consistent small gestures, being on time.
Unhealthy: testing people instead of talking, scoreboard keeping, love bombing then withdrawal.
Technology
Healthy: phone parked away during focus and sleep, notifications off by default, intentional media windows.
Unhealthy: device in bed, endless feeds as a reflex, work chats open all evening.
A simple scoring rubric
Rate each item from 0 to 2.
0 means no, 1 means sometimes, 2 means yes.
- I feel better two hours later.
- I sleep the same or better because of it.
- I could keep this up all year.
- People close to me would approve if they knew the details.
- It saves or frees time later.
- It protects or grows my money.
- It strengthens at least one important relationship.
- It improves my baseline mood or focus.
- It does not require secrecy.
- Missing it once does not trigger panic.
16 to 20 suggests a healthy habit. 8 to 15 is mixed and needs adjustment. 0 to 7 is unhealthy and should be replaced.
How to convert a mixed habit
- Name the trigger
What happens right before the habit starts? - Shrink the behavior
Keep the cue and reward but swap in a smaller, positive action that fits the same moment. - Add friction to the old path
Time locks, app blockers, cash only, change of environment. - Make success visible
Track with a checkbox. Momentum is motivating. - Install a repair routine
When you slip, ask what happened, what changes, and which safeguard prevents a rerun.
Edge cases to think through
- Caffeine
Healthy when it supports morning focus and does not touch sleep. Unhealthy when doses rise, afternoons are foggy, or bedtime drifts. - Exercise
Healthy when it builds strength and recovery. Unhealthy when it replaces sleep, causes injuries you ignore, or becomes a shield from problems you need to address. - Diet rules
Healthy when they simplify choices and maintain energy. Unhealthy when they cause obsession, social isolation, or cycles of guilt. - Work intensity
Healthy when deep work has clear edges and real recovery follows. Unhealthy when urgency is constant and rest feels unsafe.
The weekly habit audit
- List your top five repeated behaviors.
- Score them with the rubric.
- For any score under 12, write one change that would raise the score by two points.
- Schedule the change for the next seven days.
- Review results next week and keep the gains.
A rule you can trust
If a habit protects sleep, deepens attention, keeps promises, and leaves you proud of how you spent your time, it is healthy. If it steals those things, even slowly, it is not. Measure by outcomes, not intentions, and let your standards choose for you.