We all have things we avoid—tasks, conversations, decisions, or responsibilities that make us uncomfortable. Sometimes, we delay them because they seem difficult, boring, or emotionally draining. Other times, we fear failure, rejection, or the unknown. But the truth is, the very things we avoid often hold the key to our growth, progress, and success.

By asking yourself, “What am I avoiding?” and choosing to do that instead, you confront the barriers holding you back and move forward with clarity and purpose. This article explores why avoidance happens, how to recognize it, and how facing what you avoid can lead to transformation.

1. Why Do We Avoid Things?

Avoidance is a natural psychological response, often triggered by discomfort or perceived difficulty. Understanding why we avoid something helps us address it more effectively.

a. Fear of Failure or Rejection

• You hesitate to start something because you fear not doing it perfectly.
• Example: Avoiding applying for a job because you’re afraid of rejection.

b. Overwhelm

• The task seems too big or complex, so you push it aside.
• Example: Avoiding an important project because it feels daunting.

c. Lack of Motivation

• Some tasks seem dull or uninteresting, making procrastination tempting.
• Example: Putting off exercise or financial planning because it’s not enjoyable.

d. Emotional Discomfort

• Difficult conversations or personal reflections can bring discomfort, so we avoid them.
• Example: Not addressing relationship issues because they feel too emotionally charged.

e. Perfectionism

• If you believe something must be done flawlessly, you might avoid starting altogether.
• Example: Not launching a creative project because you fear it won’t be good enough.

2. The Power of Doing What You Avoid

What if, instead of avoiding these things, you tackled them head-on? Facing avoidance has immense benefits:

a. Builds Confidence and Momentum

• The longer we avoid something, the scarier it seems. Taking action proves that it’s often not as bad as we imagined.

b. Reduces Anxiety

• Avoidance creates mental stress and guilt. Confronting what you avoid relieves that burden.

c. Increases Productivity

• Tackling the most avoided tasks first frees up mental space and energy for other priorities.

d. Leads to Breakthroughs

• The tasks or decisions we avoid often hold the key to new opportunities and growth.

3. How to Identify What You’re Avoiding

Sometimes, avoidance is subconscious. Here’s how to recognize it:

a. Ask Yourself Directly

• Take a moment to reflect: “What am I avoiding right now?”
• Be honest about what comes to mind—whether it’s a task, conversation, or decision.

b. Look at Your To-Do List

• Which items have been on your list the longest?
• Which tasks make you feel resistance or dread?

c. Observe Procrastination Patterns

• What activities do you default to instead of doing what matters? (e.g., social media, Netflix, busywork)

d. Notice Emotional Reactions

• Does thinking about something trigger stress or discomfort? That’s a sign you may be avoiding it.

4. How to Take Action on What You’re Avoiding

Once you’ve identified what you’re avoiding, here’s how to tackle it effectively:

a. Do It First

• Start your day by addressing what you’ve been avoiding. This eliminates the mental burden early on.

b. Break It Down

• If the task feels overwhelming, break it into smaller steps.
• Example: Instead of “Write my book,” start with “Write 200 words today.”

c. Set a Timer

• Commit to working on the avoided task for just 10-15 minutes. Often, you’ll find it easier to continue.

d. Reframe the Task

• Instead of seeing it as an obligation, view it as an opportunity for growth.

e. Focus on the Outcome

• Remind yourself why it matters and how you’ll feel once it’s done.

f. Use Accountability

• Tell a friend or colleague about your plan to take action.

5. Real-Life Examples of Overcoming Avoidance

a. Avoiding a Tough Conversation?

• Instead of dodging it, initiate the conversation and clear the air.
• Result: Less anxiety, stronger relationships.

b. Avoiding a Fitness Routine?

• Start with just 5-10 minutes of movement instead of waiting for motivation.
• Result: Increased energy and health.

c. Avoiding a Big Project?

• Break it into micro-tasks and complete one small step today.
• Result: Progress builds momentum.

d. Avoiding Financial Planning?

• Take 30 minutes to review your budget and plan next steps.
• Result: Greater control over your finances.

6. The Ripple Effect of Facing Avoidance

Each time you choose action over avoidance, you strengthen resilience and self-trust. You develop a habit of tackling challenges instead of running from them, leading to:
Greater confidence in your ability to handle discomfort.
Higher productivity as you stop delaying important tasks.
More personal growth by confronting fears and taking responsibility.
A freer mind as you eliminate the mental clutter of unfinished business.

7. Conclusion: Stop Avoiding, Start Thriving

Avoidance creates stress, stagnation, and missed opportunities. But every moment is a chance to change that. By regularly asking yourself, “What am I avoiding?” and choosing to act on it, you develop courage, discipline, and momentum in life.

So, right now, ask yourself: What’s one thing I’ve been avoiding? Take a deep breath, take the first step, and watch how your life transforms.