Admiring others is natural, but admiration should not blur reality. To keep relationships healthy and balanced, it is important to see people for who they truly are, rather than elevating them to unrealistic levels. Here is a list of strategies for practicing this perspective in daily life.
1. Notice Both Strengths and Flaws
When you admire someone, pause and remind yourself that they also have limitations. Acknowledge their talents while also recognizing their imperfections. This keeps your perspective balanced.
2. Resist Comparing Yourself
Avoid the habit of measuring your worth against theirs. Their abilities do not diminish your own. Remind yourself that admiration does not require self-devaluation.
3. Ask Grounding Questions
When you catch yourself idealizing someone, ask questions like: “What challenges might they face?” or “What areas might they struggle in?” These reflections keep them human in your eyes.
4. Focus on Common Ground
Instead of dwelling only on what makes someone impressive, look for what you share. Shared struggles, habits, or vulnerabilities make admiration more realistic and relatable.
5. Appreciate Without Overvaluing
It is possible to respect someone’s talents without assuming they are perfect. Practice saying, “I admire this quality, but I also know they have flaws like everyone else.”
6. Watch for Signs of Idealization
Pay attention if you start excusing poor behavior, ignoring red flags, or feeling “less than” in their presence. These are signs you may be placing them on a pedestal.
7. Value Your Own Qualities
List your own strengths regularly. The more you affirm your abilities, the less likely you are to inflate others at the expense of yourself.
8. Separate Role from Person
A leader, teacher, or partner may excel in one role but still be imperfect outside of it. Remind yourself that no role defines someone’s entire character.
9. Allow for Mistakes
When someone you admire makes an error, resist the urge to feel shocked or betrayed. Instead, accept it as part of their humanity. This approach prevents disillusionment.
10. Practice Equal Respect
Approach all relationships as exchanges between equals. Even if someone teaches, guides, or inspires you, remind yourself that your perspective and worth carry the same weight.
Conclusion
Keeping admiration grounded in reality requires active awareness. By noticing flaws alongside strengths, resisting self-comparison, and treating others as equals, you avoid the trap of pedestals. These strategies help you cultivate healthier, more authentic relationships where respect flows both ways.