In life, you’re going to meet smooth talkers, attention-seekers, manipulators, and people who simply have no idea what they’re talking about but say it with confidence. Knowing how to spot when someone is full of it can save you time, energy, and trust. It’s not about being cynical. It’s about being aware.
Here’s how to tell when someone is not being real—and what signs to look for when evaluating whether their words match reality.
1. Their Story Keeps Changing
If someone tells you one version of a story today and a slightly different version next week, pay attention. Honest people may forget minor details, but the core of what happened stays consistent. Liars and exaggerators adjust their stories based on who’s listening or what reaction they want.
2. They Speak in Extremes
When someone always uses absolute language—“everyone says,” “nobody else can,” “it’s guaranteed”—they’re often covering for a lack of real evidence. Confident people speak clearly but acknowledge complexity. People who are full of it hide behind dramatic overstatements.
3. They Can’t Back It Up
Ask questions. A truthful person welcomes curiosity. Someone who’s full of it will get defensive, vague, or irritated when you ask for specifics. They may change the subject or attack your character instead of addressing the facts.
4. They Overuse Name-Dropping and Credentials
People trying to impress often rely on external associations. “I know a guy,” or “I worked with someone big,” or “I’ve read all the books.” But when pressed for actual insight or examples, they can’t deliver. Real expertise speaks for itself. It doesn’t need a spotlight.
5. Their Actions Don’t Match Their Words
This is the biggest clue. They say they’re reliable, but they never show up. They talk about integrity, but lie when it’s convenient. They claim to be generous, but only when people are watching. If the talk never leads to consistent behavior, you’re looking at someone who’s selling an image, not living it.
6. They Constantly Shift Blame
People who are full of it rarely own mistakes. They’re always the victim of someone else’s failure, misinterpretation, or jealousy. Watch how someone talks about their past. If they’re never at fault, they’re likely not being honest—with you or themselves.
7. They Love Attention, Not Accountability
They want the credit, the compliments, the applause. But when it comes to showing up when it matters, they’re gone. They overpromise and underdeliver. They say what sounds good but have no interest in doing what’s necessary. This isn’t confidence. It’s performance.
8. They Try Too Hard to Be Believable
When someone gives excessive details, repeats the same points, or insists, “I swear I’m telling the truth,” they may be overcompensating. Honesty is often simple and direct. Lies are built to sound believable—until you look too closely.
9. They Rely on Flattery and Manipulation
If they always tell you what you want to hear, watch out. Flattery is a tool for control when it’s not sincere. Someone who is full of it will build you up quickly to gain your trust—then use that trust for their own advantage.
10. Your Gut Feels Off
Sometimes the truth doesn’t show up in words—it shows up in the tension you feel when something just doesn’t add up. If you find yourself making excuses for their behavior, second-guessing your instincts, or feeling confused after every interaction, something’s not right.
Final Thought
Spotting when someone is full of it isn’t about being suspicious of everyone. It’s about sharpening your perception. Watch what people do, not just what they say. Test the consistency between their image and their actions. Trust can be powerful—but only when it’s placed in the right people. When something doesn’t feel real, don’t ignore it. Investigate it. Because in a world full of talk, honesty stands out—and so does deception.