We’ve all said it: “Just one last time.” Whether it’s indulging in a sweet treat, hitting snooze on the alarm, or procrastinating on a project, the phrase feels harmless, even rational. After all, what’s one more time? But as we often discover, “one last time” rarely remains singular. Instead, it can gradually evolve into a repeating cycle, forming a habit that’s tough to break. How does this happen, and why is it so difficult to stop?

The Psychology Behind “One Last Time”

At its core, the “one last time” mindset is a form of self-justification. When we’re faced with something we know we shouldn’t do—or something we should do but don’t want to—the phrase provides a mental escape. It allows us to indulge without feeling guilty, promising ourselves that this moment will be the last.

However, there’s a psychological phenomenon known as the “what the hell effect” that often comes into play. This concept, first researched in the context of dieting, explains how once we’ve broken a commitment (such as a diet or a productivity plan), we’re more likely to continue indulging in that behavior. It’s the mindset of “Well, I’ve already messed up, so what’s the harm in continuing?”

For example, if someone on a diet says, “I’ll just have one last piece of cake,” and then gives in, they might feel like they’ve failed their goal. Instead of stopping at that one piece, they think, “I’ve already had the cake, might as well have more.” The slippery slope begins.

The Role of Dopamine

Dopamine, the neurotransmitter associated with pleasure and reward, plays a significant role in why we keep returning to behaviors we intended to stop. Every time we indulge in something enjoyable, such as scrolling through social media or eating something delicious, our brain releases dopamine, reinforcing the action. This creates a powerful feedback loop: we perform an action, we feel good, and we want to repeat it.

The brain remembers that saying “one last time” resulted in a reward, so the next time the temptation arises, it becomes even harder to resist. In fact, the anticipation of the reward can trigger the release of dopamine before we’ve even taken the action, making it feel nearly irresistible. Thus, “one last time” becomes less about self-control and more about managing a neurochemical response.

How “One Last Time” Turns Into a Habit

1. Short-Term Gratification Wins: Humans are wired to seek pleasure and avoid discomfort. When we say “one last time,” we’re prioritizing short-term gratification over long-term goals. This decision feels good in the moment, but it often comes at the expense of our future selves. Over time, these repeated decisions compound, creating a habit loop that’s difficult to break.
2. Decreased Sense of Consequence: The first time we break a commitment to ourselves, we might feel guilty or frustrated. But each time we say “one last time” and follow through with the action, the emotional impact lessens. This desensitization makes it easier to justify the behavior again and again, turning it into a habit.
3. Eroding Willpower: Willpower is a finite resource. Each time we resist temptation, we deplete a little bit of that willpower. When we give in and say, “one last time,” it’s often a signal that our willpower reserves are low. Unfortunately, the more we give in, the weaker our willpower becomes, making it harder to resist the next time.
4. The Creation of a Habit Loop: Charles Duhigg, in his book The Power of Habit, outlines the “habit loop” consisting of three components: cue, routine, and reward. For example, a stressful day at work (cue) might lead someone to say, “I’ll just watch one more episode of my favorite show” (routine), resulting in relaxation and distraction (reward). Over time, the brain begins to automatically follow this loop, and what started as a one-time indulgence becomes a deeply ingrained habit.

Breaking the Cycle

If “one last time” has turned into many times, it’s important to recognize that change is possible. Here are some strategies for breaking the cycle:

1. Awareness and Mindfulness: The first step to breaking any habit is recognizing the pattern. When you find yourself thinking, “just one last time,” pause and ask yourself, “Is this really the last time, or am I starting a cycle?” Mindfulness can help you become more conscious of your decisions and recognize the slippery slope before you fall into it.
2. Shift the Language: Instead of telling yourself “one last time,” try reframing the situation. For example, you could say, “I’m choosing not to do this right now because I want to prioritize my long-term goals.” By shifting your internal dialogue, you can rewire your thought patterns and reduce the power of short-term temptations.
3. Set Clear Boundaries: Willpower can only take you so far, but setting external boundaries can help. For example, if you’re trying to cut down on social media usage, delete the app or set screen time limits. If you’re trying to stop eating unhealthy snacks, avoid keeping them in the house. By removing the temptation, you’re less likely to fall into the “one last time” trap.
4. Focus on Small Wins: Breaking a habit is hard, but focusing on small victories can help build momentum. Each time you resist the urge to indulge in “one last time,” celebrate it as a win. Over time, these small successes will accumulate and make it easier to resist the temptation in the future.

Conclusion

The phrase “one last time” often feels harmless in the moment, but it can quickly become a deceptive pattern that leads to repeated behavior. Through self-justification, dopamine’s influence, and weakened willpower, what starts as a single indulgence can evolve into a habit that’s hard to break. By becoming more aware of this cycle, shifting our internal dialogue, and setting clear boundaries, we can take control and break free from the repetition of “one last time.”

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